Blink your eyes and it will be here…2014 is going to be a great year for you and it’s time to start thinking of those New Years resolutions ! Our matchmakers have compiled a list of tried and true ways to find your path to a healthy and loving relationship, while having a lot of fun along the way!
Ditch the zero to get with the hero. You’re on the dating merry-go-round, but things aren’t so merry….that just means you’re running in circles never getting to the next level with the person you’ve been dating! If you’ve hit a stalemate (no pun intended!) with someone that you know in your heart isn’t right for you, or have found yourself waiting until that “perfect match” is ready to commit to a relationship, it’s time to move on. If it’s meant to be, it will happen regardless if you make the choice to meet other people. It will be a welcome and fun distraction from the guilt and/or frustration of your current situation. You won’t know how good you can have it until you get out there and see for yourself!
You have to have a life worth sharing before you can share it with someone else If you feel like you need to improve your finances or body image in order to be more desirable to the kind of person you want to be in a relationship with, start taking action. Taking baby steps toward your ideal lifestyle will keep you inspired and confident which are highly attractive qualities . Before you know it, you WILL begin attracting people who are more ideal for your long-term relations hip goals .
Like attracts like; are you looking for a rugged outdoorsman, yet the thought of camping makes you cringe? You find yourself drawn to a classy and worldly woman, but you feel most comfortable in shorts and a ball cap when you go to dinner? It’s time to get honest about how to attract your potential mate or reevaluate what it is about specific characteristics that you actually are attracted to. A carbon copy of you would make things less exciting, and it’s important that you will be able to integrate into each other’s lives based on your lifestyles and backgrounds.
Get out from behind your computer. Online dating de-humanizes your search. There is nothing more telling than live real-time communication to determine if someone is a good fit. It’s easy to lose site of what is really important in a relationship and that is the way you actually FEEL when you are with someone! Dating is not like channel flipping, so if you come across someone that you feel has your top three criteria regarding children, faith, income, etc.—reach out and ask for a concrete face-to-face meeting. People who have a positive mind set and are serious about getting in a relationship will be relieved to cut to the chase and meet up in person-in a public place, of course!
Hire a matchmaker! Take the guess work out of your dating life. When you are setup by The Real Matchmaker, it’s a easy and fun. No more scrolling through profiles, coordinating your schedules or picking out a local hotspot. We do all the work for you! You will receive invaluable insight about your behaviors and your matchmaker will share the perspective from your date. You always know where you stand with your matches through prompt follow up by your own personal matchmaker!
For more information contact Jessie in SoCal at 855-664-4588 or Anni in NorCal at 415-656-9494
PRESS RELEASE: The Real Matchmaker Helps California Singles Find a “Honey for the Holidays”
The Real Matchmaker, a personalized dating service based in California, is dedicated to helping professionals find love with unique local singles’ events and handpicked pairings. This season, the experienced dating coaches in Los Angeles and San Francisco are educating clients on how to manage often tricky holiday relationships.
Offering dating tips for men and women alike, the love and image consultants understand that many people desire a “Honey for the Holidays.” Glamourized as one of the more romantic times of the year, the holiday season is full of opportunities to meet professional singles and explore potential connections. This year, The Real Matchmaker hopes to give all of their clients the chance to have that magical kiss under the mistletoe.
The Real Matchmaker guides singles on everything from tips for a great first date to creative date ideas that incorporate local holiday events. For an organic way of meeting new people, the dating coaches suggest paying attention during Christmas shopping. Look for other patrons with similar tastes and start a conversation, or ask an interesting individual for their advice on which gift to choose.
Holiday dating for professional singles can be complicated, however. The Real Matchmaker advises against bringing someone to family events until the relationship has had time to grow. Instead, go ice-skating together or take a Christmas lights tour.
No matter the season, California singles can always find support from The Real Matchmaker’s date coaches and personal image consultants. From individually selected, one-on-one dates and interest-based events for singles to online dating profile tips and exclusive singles’ forums, The Real Matchmaker helps clients find compatible, exciting, and attractive connections.
Learn more or join The Real Matchmaker’s network by contacting the personal dating coaches at 855-664-4LUV or through their online form. For upcoming events, such as speed dating in Los Angeles on Dec. 8 and 14, contact a member of The Real Matchmaker’s team: Los Angeles and Orange County professionals are encouraged to contact Jessie Kay at firstname.lastname@example.org, while interested individuals in San Francisco can reach Anni Powers at email@example.com.
About The Real Matchmaker
The Real Matchmaker is a date scouting agency serving Los Angeles, Orange County, and San Francisco. Its dating coaching and image consultation services help single professionals meet interesting and compatible individuals through handpicked matches and local singles’ events. The dating coaches offer date tips for a wide range of situations and customize the experience to the clients’ needs.
The Real Matchmaker
“Too cool for school”, Ben Stiller said it best in Zoolander: “You may think you’re too cool for school, but I got a news flash for you…you AREN’T.” Often applied with considerable sarcasm which generally means a person who is deemed to have an inflated self-image. I think that most single people struggle with knowing how to approach and take advantage of every opportunity to meet new people. As an Expert Matchmaker, I always encourage my clients (especially the single men) to engage with others in a relaxed and cool manner; all the while knowing the difference between coming across as cool and not conceited. It is never easy if you’ve been out of the dating game for a while and you’re afraid of over compensating or trying to hard to impress; driving away potential friendships/dates. Dating and mingling with others takes time and persistence in order to find your mojo.
Here are 10 easy tips that will help you date and socialize smarter not harder.
- Remember to always walk into a room and share with everyone your best asset, “your smile”. By nature we are all attracted to happy, high energy people.
- Posture is something people forget about. Practice walking and talking tall and with confident posture everywhere you go. For goodness sake put a pep in your step!!
- Think of yourself as a “9” on a scale of 1-10. Tell yourself that you ARE attractive, interesting, funny and successful.
- Take the time to become a good listener and genuinely show interest in others, valuing their time and conversation.
- Learn to add into your conversation playful banter and light harmless teasing. Focus on showing others around you a good time.
- Appear a little hard to get, challenging, fun and confident by saying things like, “Now don’t get your hopes up, I’m not that easy to get a date with” or “Listen, I don’t care what everyone else is saying about you… I think you’re great.”
- Body language is important, relax and make friendly eye contact (if your interested in someone, give them the 3 second gaze). Lean forward a little bit, when talking with someone (it shows confidence). Don’t cross your arms and keep your hands relaxed.
- Aside from body language, other elements of your appearance can affect how approachable you look. Dressing in clothing that is light/bright colors with textures that look soft, trendy and playful will help you look more approachable.
- Introduce yourself immediately to strangers at a social function – get the awkwardness out of the way immediately, and you’ll come across as cool and collected (always have 2 or 3 fun relatable stories you like to tell on the tip of your tongue).
- Once you have your introduction and conversation topics well prepared, don’t give yourself hours to get nervous – concentrate on something else to occupy your mind until it’s time to go out and socialize. Don’t over-think, just follow the plan, stand up straight, make eye contact, smile and talk clearly about happy things.
Its now time to put your “coolness” into action, join a singles group, speed dating group, singles events or call a local Expert Matchmaker to help jump start your dating adventure . Remember the art of building confidence is taking risks and having the ability (and the guts) to do things that scares you. Don’t change what you are, just learn to be more confident in who you are.
Expert Matchmaker for LA/OC
Reading about break-ups on a matchmaker blog may seem a bit ironic because we’re here to get people into relationships, not OUT of them. Well, the fact is that most of us have suffered a break up or two in our lives. Going through the end of a relationship can be devastating.
Then the time comes a time when the dust begins to settle and the possibility of finding a new match doesn’t seem as scary as say, polar bearing So what’s the next step after a break-up?
The most important step before you get serious about dating again is to put on the oxygen mask. That means that you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of someone else. If you are still resentful about your ex, feeling insecure about your ability to attract a partner, have a difficult time trusting, etc., take the steps to move past your anger and doubt. Beyond reading self-help books and therapy, there are things you can do to distract yourself from the pain of being single again and re-discover a wiser and more fulfilled version of yourself. Here are a few to get you excited about finding love (and you will!):
Be a Good Samaritan-Volunteering is a wonderful outlet because helping others helps to build your sense of self-value and enables you to open your heart. Also, you may meet someone who is just as passionate about helping others-and that is hot.
Learn Something New-If you’ve always wished you learned to tango, brushed up on your Spanish, or that you were a better cook, then now is the time to do it. Not only will you fill up the space you once spent with your partner, your confidence will soar and you’ll cross an item off your bucket list. Again, you open yourself to potentially meeting other quality singles by expanding your social life.
Improve your surroundings-Give your bedroom a sexy makeover (luxurious sheets, anyone?), de-clutter and get organized (chuck that ugly painting your ex loved!), re-arrange your furniture, or plant a garden. Investing inyour environment eases loneliness and motivates you to share it with someone new.
Refresh your wardrobe-You are going to need some new date clothes for sure, and it’s likely your look has gotten a little stale or styles have changed since your last rodeo. For the love of God, get rid of your old underwear and socks (bras too, ladies!), and spoil yourself with new ones that you won’t mind showing off. And yes, there is such a thing as sexy socks.
Everyone is different when it comes to finding the best way to meet singles, and depending on your circumstances, things may have changed dramatically on the dating scene since you were last single. Online dating wasn’t around 20 years ago! You may be a few years out of college and scoping out hotties at a toga party or a bar crawl isn’t exactly your speed these days. The thing is, there are smarter ways to find your match than online dating, or standing around awkwardly at a bar. You can try a fun Single’s Party, or have an expert matchmaker go to work finding matches that are chosen just for you.
You’ve read this far and you should be feeling stoked about who will be lucky enough to benefit from your mad cooking skills and play footsie with those sexy socks-but please, take them off before you hit those fancy new sheets! Go fill out your free, confidential Real Matchmaker Single Social Network Profile now to jump start your new and improved love life!
Do you find yourself always dating the wrong woman or the wrong man? Then you likely have a dating pattern that you need to break.
Sometimes, because people come in different shapes and sizes, we are often tricked into thinking they are different from our previous relationships. In reality this is not always the case. Ladies, you may be dating someone who is more quite and shy than the ultra-manly man you dated before, but he is still not connecting emotionally. Fella’s, maybe you tried to date a woman who was a teacher because you thought she would be sweet and nurturing than your high powered ex, but she still seems too not have time for you. The reason it seems like “they’re all the same” is because, subconsciously, you are picking the same types of people to date. So the problem starts with you and your choices that your making.
If you’re reading this and feel like you could be making the mistakes with your love life, than take out a pen. Make a list of your 5 past relationships (good or bad), then list the first 5 qualities you liked and disliked about them that pop into your head. As you’re writing your list, you will soon be able to see a pattern. If the pattern is you date women who are not nurturing, start ask qualifying questions as you are getting to know your potential partner. For instance, “I love to stay home and make a delicious meal with a glass of wine. Do you like to cook? Are you open to cooking together?” You could also try the playful approach. “I’m a little childlike, when I’m sick. Are you a good nurse?” Judge her responses to your questions to decide whether or not she will be the type of nurturing woman you desire.
Figuring out the mind of a man is a little more difficult. The easiest way to judge them is by their actions. If your pattern is dating men who are emotionally unavailable, be wary of men who make excuses for not showing more emotion or refuse to open up about their personal lives. It’s important to make sure you both are on the same page with your feelings and expectations. If he says ‘I could see myself with you,’ that doesn’t necessarily mean he wants to be with you. Relationships can be tricky. Yes, sometimes a man is confused about what he wants; but as a woman, how long do you wait around for him to figure it out? It’s a thin line between a man being confused and him stringing you along; make it your business to find out early on, which is which. Your feelings will thank you in the long run.
These are just two examples of possible bad dating patterns, but your pattern may be different. If you’re dating relationships aren’t working for you, challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone now. Attend singles events, make new friends and love yourself more. A dating coach is a great resource to help you identify and break dating patterns that are negatively impacting you’re dating life.
The Real Matchmaker LA
We all have heard the saying “Nice Guys finish last.” Admittedly, I hate this saying. If you are a Nice Guy, you don’t have to turn into a Bad Boy to get the woman of your dreams. “Oh Yeah?” you nice guys may be thinking to yourself, “Well then why is it that when I am polite, and chivalrous, and complimentary I always seem to get the shaft?”
Here’s what it is: “Nice Guys” are generally too accommodating. Nice Guys ask for permission too often and apologize when they think she might be having a thought of disapproval for the most trivial reasons. Nice guys don’t challenge or oppose… they do everything right! So WHY isn’t she taking the bait? Because you are using a carrot, not cupcake.
“I’ve always found it difficult to identify with men in their 30’s” Says 34 year old Melissa. Melissa is is a tall thin brunette, with understated style wearing black skinny jeans, a blue cashmere sweater that drapes around her collar bone, and nude Tori Burch ballet flats. She works passionately as a full time consultant for a prominent software company in Silicon Valley, but her real joy is in raising her eight year old daughter from her first marriage. Melissa is not your typical mid-thirties Bay Area woman. She prefers to spend her free time at the ballet, enjoying a quiet leisurely dinner with a close friend at a new restaurant, or at the theater. “I would rather put my head in a vice than go to a bar to meet guys!” Melissa laughs, “When I meet guys my age they are usually in a different place in their lives-still wanting to rage with their friends on the weekend, going to loud concerts, or snowboarding in Tahoe. Those things are fine for some people, but it’s just not who I am.” It’s for those reasons that Melissa has had the most success dating men in their 40’s who may have like her, divorced and are raising children.
Many women in their 40’s and 50’s assume that men in their age range are automatically going to opt for dating women in their 30’s. “That is certainly not the case”, says John, a fit all-American looking 54 year old CFO. “I want a woman who I can identify with. It’s nice if she understands what raising kids is all about, but I still want to go out and have fun! I would love to meet a woman my age who looks great, has a fun and positive attitude, and wants a loving affectionate relationship. Sure, women in their 30’s are attractive and fun to date for a little while, but it never works out because we are at different stages in our lives”
The bottom line, is that there are very few singles out there who are true “age-ists”, dating those only who are within a chronological age range. The vast majority of singles are open to dating someone a few years outside of their age range if their level of attraction and lifestyles mirror each other. “I still want to ‘match’ my partner when we are walking down the street together” says Melissa “I’d be mortified if someone mistook my partner for being my father!”
Determining the right age range for yourself is less about the actual number, but your relationship history, goals, lifestyle and interests. When you keep in mind that age is incredibly subjective, especially after 45, you open yourself up to more opportunities to meet someone who shares your values and relationship goals!