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You’re right. Dating in LA can be difficult. And to some, it even sucks. Which is why we got professional dating coach (!!!) Laurel House to walk us through why dating here is different from anywhere else in the world, so we all at least know what we’re up against.

Everyone is always “on”

Runyon Canyon is supposed to be the kind of relaxed type of place where people should have their guard down, but instead everyone is in full hair and makeup, and unnecessarily sexy athletic wear, JUST IN CASE.

Age is truly just a number

Thanks to age-confusing plastic surgery and makeup, it’s not uncommon to go from dating someone who could be your parent to someone who could be your kid.

Is it a date, interview, reality show taping, or networking opportunity?

On the rare occasion that you are actually asked out in person, the purpose isn’t always clear. Do they want to hire you or screw you? Or both? Or… neither?

You’ll date someone who’s an entrepreneur, producer, writer, actor, director, or model

Aka someone who’s under- or unemployed. Or both.

Accidentally meeting someone on the street or in passing is rare

Lots of us work from home, leaving little time for in-person social interactions. And for those of us who have real “jobs,” unlike in cities where public transportation is the norm, we sequester ourselves in our cars, only to deposit ourselves at the office. Bumping into that person you were flirting with last night? Not gonna happen.

Each town has its own type

Santa Monica, Venice, Hollywood, West Hollywood, Hermosa, Silver Lake, Beverly Hills, Pasadena, Sherman Oaks, or Downtown… more than being a driving distance apart, each area is an attitude apart, too. From hipster to highfalutin, beach bum to buttoned-up, where a person resides can say a lot about their personality, profession… and tendency to be on time.

Divorced with kids? That’s a turn… on?

In LA, having a kid can be even more of a turn on: it shows that you know how to be responsible, nurture, and care for another. And in a town filled with flakes, that’s seriously sexy.

Absolutely everyone is online

Because of the urban sprawl, workaholic hours, and number of work-from-home entrepreneurs/actors/writers/directors/models, online dating long ago shed itself of any stigma. Sometimes it feels like another form of social media as you are matched up with your neighbor, co-worker, best friend, best friend’s ex, and even your own ex. Awkward? Sure. Part of the deal? Yup.

“Do I know you?” “Oh. Sorry.”

You have to be careful who you smile at, wave to, or approach and ask “do I know you?” Chances are high that you know them from either seeing them on the big screen, little screen, or online dating scene, which is particularly unfortunate if you’ve repeatedly ignored or turned them down.

There is literally someone more beautiful and richer (or they claim to be) at the next table

You will never be the prettiest, richest, most successful, or most famous person in LA (sorry) — there will always be someone better than you in all superficial departments, which makes dating a constant merry-go-round if you’re just in it to have fun or be arm candy. It’s way too easy for anyone to turn their head to the left or right, and see something more tempting.

Expectations are exceedingly high, thanks to a few truly wealthy guys

Sorry dudes, once a lady’s been treated to the tasting menu at Melisse or box seats at the Hollywood Bowl, happy hour drinks seem a bit… dismal.

But just because a dude pulls up in a Porsche, it doesn’t mean he can pay his rent

And just because he drives a “regular” car, it doesn’t mean he’s barely getting by. Tons of wealthy dudes have low-profile cars specifically to find out whether they’re dating a gold digger.

Great article by Lauren House — Thank you!
Jessie the Matchmaker 
Expert Matchmaker 18+ years 
“Date Smarter Not Harder” 
1 855-664-4588
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Get UN-SINGLE for 2015

It’s about two weeks into 2015 and amongst all the resolutions, you will have thought about your relationship situation, especially if it’s non-existent. If you felt lost, frazzled and exhausted about your dating life in 2014, then now is the time to get CLEAR VISION about your dating life in 2015.
Get a clear vision on your relationship goalsimages-3 
What is it you are after? Long term relationship? Marriage? Or just dating?  Are you really looking for a serious relationship?  Decide on what it is you are after before you set foot on a date or make decisions about joining a matchmaker or an online dating site.  If you are asked about what you are looking for, express a clear vision and be honest. Be truthful to yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for what you want.
Get a clear vision on your dating strategyimages-4
So you’ve decided that 2015 is the year to get UN-SINGLE.  Are you asking for too much? Are you really setting realistic goals? Are you being so picky that now you are the one standing in your own way?  Most singles are busy and may or may not have a plan, nevertheless stick to a plan. Listen it’s all well and good if you are leaving it to fate or the universe but seriously, your Mr. or Ms. Right will not come knocking on your door.  So it’s your choice to decide to try a little bit of everything (online dating, hitting the bars, matchmaking, singles events, makeover or taking up a new hobby) then make a plan and start the process.  It will require a bit of persistence, everybody knows that online dating can be a chore at times but nothing worthwhile comes easy.  Keep your options open as you never know where and when a great person may show up.
Get a clear vision on the type of MATE you want to meetimages-5
Saying you want someone kind, happy and giving is a good start but it doesn’t say much else about the qualities you want. A good place to start is to look at yourself and define the kind of characteristics you have with a written list.  What is so great about you?  A relationship works best if you have similar qualities. So if you are ambitious, funny, well-dressed, sporty, attractive, educated then the chances are, you will want someone similar.  Of course, there will be times when you meet someone ambitious, funny and well educated but they turn out to be obsessed with work, critical and your sense of humor doesn’t match up.  Your ‘type’ may need to be refined after each date. Its always a good idea to take mental notes or keep a log so you’re making positive progress after each date. Please remember, having a very stringent list can lead to nothing good!
Get a clear vision on your lifestyle choicesUnknown
Your lifestyle choices can play a big part in stopping you from meeting new attractive singles. If you work long hours, take a step back and allow yourself free time for your hobbies, interests, friends, singles events and dating. Hanging around with your married friends and their children will leave you on the shelf just gathering dust and with most things on a shelf there is an expiration date. Pay special attention to where you live and your surroundings. Are you near and around the types of people you would like to meet and pursue? You get the picture right? You have to make changes to see the positive results and open yourself up to new and better opportunities to meet new attractive singles.
At THE REAL MATCHMAKER, our plan is to help people get a CLEAR VISION on they’re dating lives and get UN-SINGLE. We are here to offer support, love and encouragement all along the way.  GET UN-SINGLE in 2015!
Jessie the Matchmaker 
855-664-4588 (4LUV) 
Expert Matchmaker for 18+ years 
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She said “YES” to a 2nd Date… Now What Guys?



You made it through the first date with a woman you really like.  She also gave you a kiss at the end of the night and accepted your request for a second date. You’re the Man! Now, use this time wisely and figure out if you really have chemistry together. It can be hard to figure out chemistry on a first date because its not always based on physical attraction alone. On your second date, do something fun like a activity or a walk to a cozy restaurant where you can share food.  This will be a more comfortable outing and give you both a chance to share more of your true personalities towards each other. Its time to get playful guys!

Use your second date to help you get to know if she likes your personality, your looks and your presence.  Its not all about her guys, its also your time to take mental notes and see if she is a good match for you.


  •  If you’re an outdoorsy guy, ask her on a date to do something like fishing or hiking, biking, then have a nice picnic together. That way you will know if she shares your passions and interest.
  • If you’re a hands on guy with an adventurous side think about trying a pottery classes (you remember the sexy scene in Ghost), cooking classes, gun range, golf range, and painting classes are all fun to do together. These kind of activities will help you create good memories with your date and you will discover if you both play well together.

By doing this you will learn more about her, it will differ based on what activity you choose for your second date.  I can tell you one thing though, you will still learn much more about your date by doing an activity then just confined to generic dinner date conversation.  Sky is the limit when you push the envelope and differentiate yourself from other dates she has been on in her past.

Until next time, good luck!

Always in love with love, 



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Single Dad’s, Good To Date- Happy Father’s Day!

Very often, people – especially if they don’t have kids of their own – are apprehensive about dating single parents. Dating a parent, by all outward appearances, looks like a situation that is automatically more complicated, which means more likely for it to not work out, and when it inevitably doesn’t work out, there are potentially a greater number of people involved who could get hurt. Harsh but true.

Dating a single parent is can be the greatest thing ever, and I feel bad that so many of you might be missing out. I know you’re inclined not to believe me right now. Here are 10 good reasons why… Bam!


1) Birth control: They take it seriously, they understand that having a child is a Huge responsibility.

Guess who never forgets to use condoms?

2) They’re less likely to rush into things; they take the time to get to know you before introducing you to his kids.

By taking your time to get to know him, you will be creating this a satisfying respect and likeness first.  A combination of “can’t get enough of each other” and “not having infinite time to spend together” equals “always wanting more”. Which is hot and romantic.

3) Their bags, home and car are like survival kits– everything except the kitchen seat.

There is nothing he doesn’t have, he comes first aid ready.

4) They take there time and have been known to be really good in the bed

You’re just infinitely more aware of yourself, and far less self-conscious. There is no way, no matter the specifics of how you like to get down, that that doesn’t result in some next-level sex action.

5) They know what makes a relationship work and they are not afraid to go for it

Just having a child at all teaches you, “holy crap, everything about human connections and interactions and how to be healthy, generous but also self-preserving, committed and flexible”.

6) They have excellent boundaries and respect your boundaries

Establishing good boundaries with others and your kids can be tricky, although single dads seem to love being cautious with your time and feelings.

7) Contrary to myths, single dads are not shopping for a new mom for their kids

Maybe we will fall gloriously in love, and you will become part of my family, and end up having a meaningful relationship with his child, and even become friends with his ex wife and we’ll all have this big modern family with lots of people engaging in highly evolved relationships and enjoying all the growth and joy that comes from that.

8) They understand selflessness and sharing 

I mean, that doesn’t mean every single parent you date is going to be selfless with you, but chances are, they are at least capable of it.

9) They’re more aware of what they want and who they want to be 

Single parents tend to be really good at knowing what they want, but not being too stubbornly attached to getting exactly that.

10) They have more structure and empathy 

Single Dads are on a schedule and they have to deal with a lot more bumps, bruises and hiccups.


So next time a single Dad asks you out make sure you celebrate his very dateable qualities.


To all the Dad! Happy Fathers Day!

Always in love with love,


Experienced Matchmaker for 18 years


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She Says “I am Just Looking To Make New Friends”

Are you getting friend zoned when you go out? More and more men are complaining about women at organized singles events, which are meant for meeting someone to date. Men have told me that lately when they have approached single women at these events, they get responses like “I am only here to make friends.” Well, I am going to give it to you straight guys! In some fashion she is right, she is there to make friends, when it comes to YOU. That doesn’t mean she isn’t looking for a relationship or a new dating experience…I mean she is at a singles event after all.

This is just a nice way of saying she isn’t interested. As a Dating Coach I always encourage women to be honest when they are not interested in a guy, but sometimes telling someone to their face that “your just not my type” isn’t always easy to say.

By know means does this mean there is something wrong with you. She is just not the one, so move on to a woman who is looking for a relationship…with a guy like you.

Always in love with love! 


]Expert Matchmaker with 18 years of experience


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Are You Undateable?

Are You Undateable?

You know the song, “Sea of love where everyone would like to drown”!    Are you still standing on the shore alone?  Have you thought about why?  Maybe it’s time to go over some of the reasons why you might be undateable.

Being honest with yourself is important.  Just because you’ve been on a date or two, but were rejected for the next or follow-up date, there is a reason.  You may be undateable.  Going over what you do and do not do on your dates gives you an outline of the possibilities of why you are undateable.  Are you a lady or a gentleman?  Do you say things that are a turn off?  Do you dress appropriately?  Are you a slob or look like a street walker?   What you wear, what you say and what you do make you dateable or undateable.

If you are talking about a bad break up on your date, your ex, how he/she was in bed,   it’s a turn off!  You are undateable!  Do you practice the golden rule, even in bed – do unto others as you’d have them do unto you?  Do you have a great kiss, as a kiss without a French kiss, is not a kiss.  Where do you draw the line?

Do you have passion or are you just in it for the sex?   Are you desperate?  Using that excuse, “I have to get up early for a meeting tomorrow”, or “I have a headache, I’m really tired”.  It’s worn out, it’s cliché, and that next date – well, you know the answer.

Breaking bad habits may be difficult, but extremely important if you are looking for a relationship, that starts with being dateable.   Contact us at for a personal consultation or for meet your matchmaker day, and we will make sure you are on your way for that date you’ve always been looking for, and “drowning in the sea of love”.

Always in love with love! 


Expert Matchmaker for 18 years 



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Creative Ideas For Meeting Single Men & Women


THE REAL MATCHMAKER – Creative Ideas for meeting single men and women

Whew!  Being single is like a part-time job. If you have been looking to find love “in all the right places”, but it hasn’t happened, here are a few fun and creative ideas for meeting men and women.

Starting with a few small steps goes a long way.  The key to meeting someone naturally is always, always, look good and don’t forget your best accessory “Your smile.”  There is competition, and you don’t want to be bypassed because of sweat pants, flip flops and unwashed hair!  A good place to meet men is at the market/grocery store, the smaller one’s — they like to get in and get out.  Probably later in the day is better, as they usually want to just get it done.  The hardware store is also a place that you can innocently ask for that little bit of advice or a tip, from that guy in the aisle that caught your eye.  

Have you forgotten about the library or bookstore?  This is a fun and creative idea for meeting men.   These men are usually the intelligent type and it’s a nice, quiet environment.  If a charity is interesting to you, it is one of the best places to meet men.   Men doing charity work is a good indicator that they are the emotionally available type.  Why not do a little charity work yourself?  It could be fun!   Have you thought of going to a tech store, such as Apple?   Just look inside.  They are full of men, and what an easy place to start up a conversation – there’s so many “how to questions”, that could help spark a conversation.  

While eating alone in a restaurant isn’t really fun, it can be creative if you have a strategy in place.  It just may be the place you meet that special man.  You took the risk and it worked!  Every man likes his steak every once in a while.  Go to a steak restaurant, and sit at a table near the bar, not the bar.  There you will have the prime position to check out all the men eating and drinking at the bar.  Once you have eye contact, it will be easy for the next step.  Men are more likely to approach you when you are alone and you don’t want to be with a friend that could be your competition!

OK ladies, if you have tried and tried, but still feel that you need that extra, personal touch, is your home.  Why wait, when you could be in love by the end of the year and who knows what next Valentine’s will be like?

For all the men out there, where have you been looking?  If you have a dog, don’t just walk down the street, go to a dog park.  What a fun and creative way to meet women and have your dog do a little socializing as well.  There are so many women there.  Starting up a conversation couldn’t be easier — what a beautiful dog, how old is your dog?   There is no better way to relax and get pampered than getting a manicure and pedicure (without the polish guys).   It’s no longer a “woman thing”.  You may have worked in the garden or changed the oil in your car and need to clean up.   Go for it, pamper yourself.  You’ll be in a roomful of women.  It’s a fun and creative idea for meeting women.  Your friends may tease you, but if you end up with a prize, they may try it themselves, and not admit to it.

Maybe you need to stay in shape but sweating at the gym is too much.  Try a fun and creative idea to meet women at dance classes.  You’ll be swinging to the music, shedding a few pounds, and up close and personal with your lady partners.   After that, if you enjoy wine, go to a wine tasting, it’s a little classier than the bar, and the women have a more sophisticated taste.  


Have you experimented with a few ways to meet people?  Have you run out of ideas?  If you ever need advice or that extra push, is the place to find great ideas, great service, and the love you’ve always been looking for.

Always in love with love! 


Expert Matchmaker for 18 years 

LA/OC locations 

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Share the Love on Valentines Day!

Whether you are single or taken, Valentine’s Day can stir up a slew of emotions that far from warm and fuzzy. Valentine’s Day can be a reminder that your current partner isn’t meeting your expectations and if you are single, seeing all the schmoopy Facebook comments from attached friends and family is enough to send you into an emotional tail-spin. The good news is, Valentines day isn’t just for lovers. Here at The Real Matchmaker, we like to think that Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love in and of itself! Here are some sure-fire ways to make your heart melt on Valentine’s Day, regardless if you have a sweetheart.

Happy Valentines Day

Play Cupid-Chances are you know a few other folks who are feeling a bit blue today. Surprise your lonely friends with a simple bouquet of flowers, or a small box of chocolates and write them a little love note. After all, part of the fun on Valentine’s Day is surprising the ones you love with a token of your affection!

Create a Tradition-When I lived in my home town, I would take my grandmother to her favorite Tea Room for lunch on Valentine’s Day. We would get all gussied up in our Valentine’s Day attire and talk about love. I will always cherish these memories and they are certainly some of the best Valentine’s Days I have ever had. Other ideas are taking Valentines cookies to your niece/nephew/god child’s class room, or volunteering at a community center.

Write Yourself a Love Letter- When you’re single it is so important to love yourself! Get some fancy stationary paper and write yourself a valentine note listing all the things you love about yourself and all the things you love about your life with YOU! You can seal it up and save it to read next year on Valentine’s Day.

Pamper Yourself-Go for a spa treatment, get your hair done, enjoy a mani/pedi. Not only will you feel awesome, your confidence will get a boost by sprucing up your look a bit. If you’re really feeling racy, go buy yourself a new piece of lingerie. Just because you don’t have someone to flaunt it for doesn’t mean you can’t still feel sexy!

HAVE FUN! Rally up your single pals and go out for a night on the town. Have dinner and drinks at a fancy restaurant or do a love-themed pot-luck. Make sure to tell each person why you love them!

We’re wishing all of you love bugs a Happy Valentine’s Day!



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Why Do Women See Men as Fixer-Uppers?







Why Do Women See Men as Fixer-Uppers?

As an expert matchmaker, I really had to think long and hard about this question.

Are women all really looking for the perfect man? After all, we are ransacked daily with the likes of Hollyhunks like George Clooney, Brad Pitt and David Beckman.

Most men feel like they don’t have a chance.

Women are taught to look for a man with good character and determined work ethics.

It’s not so much about changing your chivalrous personality for us. It may be more about shaping you into the image of our ideal man.

The good news is most women have a habit of always seeing the good or the potential in men. We see ruff spots on the surface and we want to sand them off, or at least sand them down so the imperfections don’t show as much.

It’s always important for women and men to understand that compromising and being somewhat flexible in a relationship is key.

Men should take it as a compliment that women want to bring out the best version of them. That means she cares.

 “Regardless of the stage of your

relationship, always be open-minded.”

Check out the rest of my blog on Click here to read more.

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Peyton Manning should be a role model for your social life.

How prepared are you to go out there and meet women on a daily basis?

How much work do you actually do before you go out on a Friday night, or do you just go out cold?

The guy who just goes out cold on a Friday night and the guy who didn’t flirt all week are usually the guys standing at the back of the bar, mentally masturbating about the hot women they’re seeing.

They’re trying to think of what to say. They’re waiting for the right minute to talk to somebody. Then they go home frustrated and annoyed at the end of the night without connecting with a single woman.

Men who go out every single day and flirt with women and talk to women are comfortable by the time Friday night rolls around.

They’ve already been speaking to women all week, so they have no problem walking over to any hot woman in the bar on a Friday night when game time comes.

“If you’re not doing the preparation, you’re going to be awful on game night.”

That’s what life’s about.

If you’re not doing the preparation during the week, you’re going to be awful on game night.

Think about Peyton Manning. He’s been playing in the NFL for 15 years or so. He practices every single week, even though he could probably just show up at this point in his career.

But he gets into the flow of the practice, and each week is a different practice session for a different team and a different game plan.

Why do you think it’s going to be different with you meeting women? Why do you think you can get away without putting in the work? Why do you think you can cheat the system of life?

You can’t!

Preparation is what life is all about. The more you prepare, the better chance of you succeeding come game time, yet so many of you don’t prepare. So many of you don’t do the small things, and so many of you blame others for not being successful.

It’s time to take action, and it’s time to take full responsibility for where your social life is heading! Great dating article from 

Bet on “YOURSELF” this year!


Expert Matchmaker for LA and OC 


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