I CAN’T HELP BUT COMPARE THE PEOPLE I DATE LATELY TO HIM
(or to HER).
🤨This is a statement I hear all to often. Many people I talk to judge others harshly and decide ahead of time that no one can ever compare to him (or her). We all have that one person we can point to and say that’s my type… but is it really? I honestly don’t think people do this consciously, I think most people do it because it feels safe. Or maybe because you truly like the way he makes you feel…you swear your heart doesn’t lie! I’ve been there too!🥺
🤔I listen to people time and time again tell me a blown up story celebrating only his or her☝🏽highs conveniently forgetting his or her👇🏽downfalls. I mean is he or she really God’s gift to earth and was he or she really the greatest lover? Really?? 😍I have my own intense crush. And I too have absolutely gotten carried away with the fantasy of a man. As humans we all are creators, the mind is an amazing instrument. It’s easy to come up with a fiction version of him (or her), remembering him as the best you’ve ever had.
Sure it may sound cheesy but it’s true…and it happens.
When you’re comparing, nothing or nobody could ever be enough. And that is why most people are harshly judging others before even knowing their story.
People can be amazing, smart, and attractive and we still feel blah about them. They just aren’t Him ( or her). I think if I am being honest I know the man in my mind and in my heart is only human – with all kinds of flaws – yet I still idealize him (you may be doing the same subconsciously).
Healing has its own clock and sometimes it takes a while. Moving forward – it’s ok to keep the memory of someone special. It’s also important to learn how to compartmentalize in your heart (find room for others). And stop comparing…I will help teach your heart to be open to possibilities. It’s important that I keep you present and show you that someone “DIFFERENT can be oh so GOOD for you!!”.