We at The Real Matchmaker have been spending a ton of time lately researching the hundreds of dating coaches out there relationship advisers out there. It’s mind-boggling! Frankly, it’s difficult to comprehend how dating coaching can be effective without actually meeting people. Our mission in doing this research was to find the common themes and condense them into a handy dandy quick read so that you can spend less time trying to figure out how to get what you want and more time actually GETTING IT.
Accept the person you are today. Acknowledge what you are most proud of. Take the steps to improve upon the areas in which you feel you need to grow. Make a commitment to say 3 nice things to yourself for every 1 negative thought.
Be a reflection of the partner you desire
Assess yourself: Career, finances, body image, social life, family values, household habits, spirituality, emotional stability, and what your relationship goals are. Are you a mirror of the partner that you desire? If not, you must choose to improve upon yourself or adjust your expectations. You must enter into a lasting relationship as equals.
Remember: You are a capable of loving and being loved. You are worthy of adoration and loyalty. You are an open invitation to love and devotion.
Let Go of Fear
This can be a challenge and it takes being very honest and vulnerable with yourself to identify the source of your fear. Fear is your biggest obstacle in attaining a healthy relationship, so we’ve developed some affirmations when you need to talk yourself off the ledge:
- Fear of rejection (not being loved)
The person you attract will be attracted to you
- Fear of needs not being met (disappointment)
The person you choose will compromise to meet your needs
- Fear of abandonment (not feeling secure)
The person you attract will be loyal and supportive
- Fear of not being good enough (not feeling valued)
The person you attract will celebrate the person you are today, not who you could potentially be
- Fear of wasting time (missed opportunities)
You make a conscious decision to let go of your Plan B and invest your heart in the person in front of you
- Fear of choosing the wrong partner (self-doubt)
You have reached a level of self-awareness and value that allows you to trust yourself in choosing a partner that is attracted to you, meets your needs, that is loyal, that celebrates who you are today, and you have let go of questioning who else is out there.
Get into ACTION
You will not bring a partner into your life without action. Get involved with singles social groups, join an online dating site, and hire a matchmaker. Make a commitment to go on at least 2 dates a month.
ccept that your life will change when you bring another into your life
You will be glad to accommodate and make room for your partner in life. Clear out space to actively seek your partner.
Change Your Mind-set About the Journey
Finding your partner should be fun. Let go of your expectations of the end result and enjoy the present. When you are engaged in the moment, happy, and care-free you will be more likely to attract a loving partner.