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Share the Love on Valentines Day!

Whether you are single or taken, Valentine’s Day can stir up a slew of emotions that far from warm and fuzzy. Valentine’s Day can be a reminder that your current partner isn’t meeting your expectations and if you are single, seeing all the schmoopy Facebook comments from attached friends and family is enough to send you into an emotional tail-spin. The good news is, Valentines day isn’t just for lovers. Here at The Real Matchmaker, we like to think that Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love in and of itself! Here are some sure-fire ways to make your heart melt on Valentine’s Day, regardless if you have a sweetheart.

Happy Valentines Day

Play Cupid-Chances are you know a few other folks who are feeling a bit blue today. Surprise your lonely friends with a simple bouquet of flowers, or a small box of chocolates and write them a little love note. After all, part of the fun on Valentine’s Day is surprising the ones you love with a token of your affection!

Create a Tradition-When I lived in my home town, I would take my grandmother to her favorite Tea Room for lunch on Valentine’s Day. We would get all gussied up in our Valentine’s Day attire and talk about love. I will always cherish these memories and they are certainly some of the best Valentine’s Days I have ever had. Other ideas are taking Valentines cookies to your niece/nephew/god child’s class room, or volunteering at a community center.

Write Yourself a Love Letter- When you’re single it is so important to love yourself! Get some fancy stationary paper and write yourself a valentine note listing all the things you love about yourself and all the things you love about your life with YOU! You can seal it up and save it to read next year on Valentine’s Day.

Pamper Yourself-Go for a spa treatment, get your hair done, enjoy a mani/pedi. Not only will you feel awesome, your confidence will get a boost by sprucing up your look a bit. If you’re really feeling racy, go buy yourself a new piece of lingerie. Just because you don’t have someone to flaunt it for doesn’t mean you can’t still feel sexy!

HAVE FUN! Rally up your single pals and go out for a night on the town. Have dinner and drinks at a fancy restaurant or do a love-themed pot-luck. Make sure to tell each person why you love them!

We’re wishing all of you love bugs a Happy Valentine’s Day!

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Break-Up…Now What?

Reading about break-ups on a matchmaker blog may seem a bit ironic because we’re here to get people into relationships, not OUT of them. Well, the fact is that most of us have suffered a break up or two in our lives. Going through the end of a relationship can be devastating.

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Then the time comes a time when the dust begins to settle and the possibility of finding a new match doesn’t seem as scary as say, polar bearing  So what’s the next step after a break-up?

The most important step before you get serious about dating again is to put on the oxygen mask. That means that you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of someone else. If you are still resentful about your ex, feeling insecure about your ability to attract a partner, have a difficult time trusting, etc., take the steps to move past your anger and doubt.  Beyond reading self-help books and therapy, there are things you can do to distract yourself from the pain of being single again and re-discover a wiser and more fulfilled version of yourself. Here are a few to get you excited about finding love (and you will!):

Be a Good Samaritan-Volunteering is a wonderful outlet because helping others helps to build your sense of self-value and enables you to open your heart.  Also, you may meet someone who is just as passionate about helping others-and that is hot. 

Learn Something New-If you’ve always wished you learned to tango, brushed up on your Spanish, or that you were a better cook, then now is the time to do it. Not only will you fill up the space you once spent with your partner, your confidence will soar and you’ll cross an item off your bucket list. Again, you open yourself to potentially meeting other quality singles by expanding your social life.

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Improve your surroundings-Give your bedroom a sexy makeover (luxurious sheets, anyone?), de-clutter and get organized (chuck that ugly painting your ex loved!), re-arrange your furniture, or plant a garden.  Investing inyour environment eases loneliness and motivates you to share it with someone new.

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Refresh your wardrobe-You are going to need some new date clothes for sure, and it’s likely your look has gotten a little stale or styles have changed since your last rodeo. For the love of God, get rid of your old underwear and socks (bras too, ladies!), and spoil yourself with new ones that you won’t mind showing off. And yes, there is such a thing as sexy socks.

 

Everyone is different when it comes to finding the best way to meet singles, and depending on your circumstances, things may have changed dramatically on the dating scene since you were last single. Online dating wasn’t around 20 years ago! You may be a few years out of college and scoping out hotties at a toga party or a bar crawl isn’t exactly your speed these days. The thing is, there are smarter ways to find your match than online dating, or standing around awkwardly at a bar. You can try a fun Single’s Partyor have an expert matchmaker go to work finding matches that are chosen  just for you.

You’ve read this far and you should be feeling stoked about who will be lucky enough to benefit from your mad cooking skills and play footsie with those sexy socks-but please, take them off before you hit those fancy new sheets! Go fill out your free, confidential Real Matchmaker Single Social Network Profile now to jump start your new and improved love life!

 

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Passion not perfection!

As a matchmaker and date scout, I interview A LOT of women and talk about the types of single men they would like to date.  One of the first qualities they desire in a partner is passion, not physical passion (well, that’s important too!), but passion for life itself. Being a single man, a successful career and taking care of your physical appearance are important; but when women describe men they’ve found irresistible the quality that made them fall head over heels was that he was interesting and had elements of his life outside of work and family that set him apart from other men.

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You don’t have to compete in triathlons or have climbed Mt Kilimanjaro to show that you have a zest for life. Instead you may dedicate your free time to charity work or maybe you are really proud of all the work you’ve done growing a vegetable garden.  Any dating coach and professional matchmaker will tell you that having a multifaceted life is not only healthy for your personal fulfillment, but is also vital and necessary in attracting an extraordinary partner.

So what are you to do if you don’t have any interests that really excite you? Short answer: Find some stat! There are a number of reasons that you haven’t prioritized your hobbies and interests.  Don’t let your busy work and social life stand in your way.  Think about all the things you have wanted to learn more about or try. Start small by going to a museum lecture or join an organization that hosts weekly activities. This will not only inspire you, but you will become more enthused about your new experiences and will have some fun and entertaining stories to share on your dates!

 

For more great dating insights and tips for singles in San Francisco contact Anni at anni@therealmatchmaker.com!

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